I had separated from my life. I had escaped from things that troubled me. In my head I kept alive dreams of love which had already died. But those futile fantasies and that person, which no longer existed – these were the only things in my life which kept me from falling apart TOTALLY.

But disconnecting from everything, even from people, and the final aberration to nowhere – almost completely out of this world – that was anyway a good experience and it took me forward. I knew very clearly – not just intellectually, but with my whole being – that there was only one possibility, only one option if I wanted to survive (- the other option – death – has never tempted me). The only road to go was to face reality. Not anymore reality as I wanted it, but reality as it is, and has been.

In that point, somewhere there, in the darkness, lost, isolated from everything – also from my own self – things started to pour down over me. All things that I didn’t want to think. In tolerable sized pieces portioned by my unconscious mind.

Pieni näyttely rakkaudesta ja hulluudesta (2010)
Näyttely oli esillä Lasipalatsin Akkuna-näyttelytilassa, Helsingissä.

A Small Exhibition about Love and Madness (2010)
Exhibited in Lasipalatsi's Akkuna-exhibition space, Helsinki.

© Marko Karpow